ELEANOR “ELLIE” RUTH HOUSE COFFEY

ADDISON — Eleanor “Ellie” Ruth House Coffey, devoted wife, mother and grandmother, passed away peacefully on March 14, 2025, at the age of 84.

Born on Nov. 21, 1940, in Mineral Wells, Miss., Ellie was reared in a multi-generational household alongside her parents, grandparents, and brother, Billy. Her early years were shaped by both love and difficulty, including her parents’ unhappy marriage, abuse by a neighbor, and her mother’s longstanding depression, followed by her tragic loss in a car accident when Ellie was 17. Growing up in a complicated family, Ellie made a quiet but powerful decision to walk a different path from those around her.

Ellie was often seen as the “good girl,” well-mannered, rule-following, and dependable. She was popular in school and masked her pain through her love of tap dance and ballet, then later cheerleading. She and a girlfriend once drove to Memphis to find Elvis at his home and was rewarded with a kiss on her forehead by the King himself. Deeply resilient, with more strength than most ever realized, Ellie bore life’s challenges with determination and never asked for recognition.

As a college student at Memphis State University, she was kidnapped at knifepoint by a stranger. By her wits, she eventually escaped only to be stalked by this disturbed man for several weeks. With the help of the FBI and County Sheriff, whose family housed her for safety, the perpetrator was eventually apprehended and served time in a state mental health hospital.

She then transferred to the University of Mississippi as James Meredith became the first African American student admitted to the then-segregated university and witnessed the infamous campus riots in 1962. She stood in line at the Ole Miss cafeteria alongside the Civil Rights activist hoping to convey her sympathy, noticing how humbly calm and resolute he remained despite the violence and hatred he regularly encountered.

At Ole Miss in that same cafeteria, Ellie later met Andrew Coffey, a graduate student who would be the love of her life. They eloped six months later as Andy left for basic training and eventually served in the Vietnam War. Thus began a long and devoted partnership that spanned almost 40 years. During Andy’s 26-year career in the U.S. Army, Ellie moved 15 times across the globe, supporting his service to the country while raising their two daughters with deep commitment and love. Much of the parenting fell to her while Andy worked, and she embraced that role fully.

After Andy retired, the couple returned to Mississippi where he could be close to the Veterans Hospital in Memphis, Tenn., and Ellie could reconnect with family. A few years later, Andy fell sick, and Ellie cared for him until his death at 61. His passing left a void in Ellie that she tried to fill with volunteering, dancing, and churchgoing. Her grief turned to depression, which preceded an eventual diagnosis of Alzheimer’s.

For 10 years, Ellie faced the slow and painful progression of the disease, which altered how she connected with the world and those she loved. It brought her to Addison to live with her oldest daughter, Julia, and her family. Yet it never erased the love she had for Andy nor her girls at the core of who she was.

Self-described as “forever a Mississippi girl,” she will be remembered for the lives she touched, the warmth, affection, and humor she carried, and the steady light she brought to a complicated world.

Ellie leaves behind daughters, Julia Erin Coffey and Jennifer Ashley Coffey; grandchildren Jessa Walker Ellis, Mathilde Eleanor Jacobsen, and Johannes Finn Jacobsen; sons-in-law Dr. William Ellis and Hakon Jacobsen; nephews James Michael House, Lawrence “Larry” Magdovitz II, and Dr. Joel Berry; and niece Beth Ann Magdovitz Hayes.

A future celebration of life ceremony will be held in Oxford, Miss. Donations can be made to Ellie’s favorite cause, Sierra Club Foundation. ◊